Pie on Life

I love me some pie. It seems like the older I get the more I like pie. Do you feel the same way? Old people love pie! If you go to a diner you'll most likely find the older set sipping on coffee and eating pie. What is it about pie that gets more attractive with age? Maybe it's that the older you get the more you appreciate the simple things in life like...refined sugar. To watch an older person eat pie makes me want to be old. Mostly bcs it's acceptable to eat pie when you are old. No one is judging your size or snickering at you for partaking in such sinful treats. They just know that you'll die soon and agree to let you have your last bit of pleasure in the form of a sugary confection placed neatly on top of a buttery piece of flaky crust. Pie is like death...it's so good, so sinful and then it all comes to and end when your crusty ass dries up and is laid to rest inside the soggy earth. Bitter sweet yet morbid.

Lemon Meringue happens to be my favorite. Here's a shocker... I don't like the crust. It's the sweet, lemony, gushy middle topped with light fluffy meringue that makes me wanna smack my Mama! When you leave the crust behind it almost like cheating death. You can sock away 10 maybe 12 pieces sans crust. My Mother tells me Lemon Meringue takes too long to make. Whatever. It's been 36 years (almost) since I was "made." I think we can agree it was worth the wait. No one from my generation eats pie. Perhaps I'm an old sole. Perhaps I'm just an old fatty. Can't be sure. I like pie. I make no excuses. The more the better. Typically pie comes at least one hour after dinner. Why? I always have room. I leave room. I make room. There's always room at the inn. Old people understand. I know bcs I push them out of the way to get to the pie at holiday dinners and all you can eat buffets. They think they can out smart me. Wrong. I am faster, smarter and able to strategically place myself at the head of the pie line. With age comes wisdom. With youth....pie.

I left room for pie at lunch today. Someone 10 years my senior ordered pie. Someone my age claimed to be full. There was a risk....get the pie and age 10 years. Stay with my generation and deprive myself a little sugary pleasure. I succumbed to the pressure. Bla bla, " I'm too full for pie." " How do you find room?" I had vacancy. I chose to leave my room empty and spare myself the untimely aging. So as I'm about to age another year I do so with the knowledge that I have years of pie ahead of me. However, my theory is that nothing in life is guaranteed. I will eat my pie before my time and pray that I live long enough to eat more!